As 2012 CLOSES...2013 OPENS

2012 began with a new outlook on continuing the residual effects from 2011...I can actually say that 2012 had a more mature look overall than any of the other past years.

I was able to take 2 vacations this year and let me just say that the last time I took an actual vacation was 3 years ago, so these 2 getaways were well planned and I was definitely able to relax, sleep and enjoy the Coronado Island and San Francisco scenery!

Mid year one of my best friends, most of you know her as DQ, had pitched the possibility of her and I actually start filming ourselves and talk about our Hair & Make-Up endeavors and start showing the public what it takes to do what we do...which is done with Love and Dedication! So after many months of deliberation on my behalf, I agreed to start a bi-weekly filming of what is now called, "Queens in the Studio" featuring DQ and BLQ. Since our August debut on our own YouTube Channel, we've had 1,353 views on 26 videos and 18 Subscribers!! We thank everyone for making this project a true success!! We have more to come as 2013 get's underway!!

The past 4 months I've had to deal with harsh truths, people coming out with their true colors, and rude awakenings in my career path as well. For some reason it's always surprising to me that whenever you give yourself fully to someone or something, there always has to be this line that get's crossed and unfortunately puts everything into shambles. Yet again, everything DOES happen for a reason and as much disappointment it can bring my heart, as long as there's life, there's the power of healing and moving forward. I can have my 5 year old tantrums although they won't get me anywhere, so in the end I had decided to continue on with LIFE as it comes and leave those who chose not to come along for the ride behind and let their direction take them wherever they chose to go to.  No hard feelings y'all just move on.

I learned the value of my craft and learned the ability to give the best of my creativity to not only my hair and make-up services, but those around me who needed a shoulder to cry on. I've always said this, I get the best outcomes with ANY project I'm involved in if I center myself in the issues and somber moods of others, for some reason it makes for a better smile and warms the heart in the end. You might make me cry a little but it's all worth it I promise!

Once upon a time I was afraid of change, I was afraid of many things because I was weary it might alter my future in such a drastic way that I wouldn't be able to recognize myself anymore. Well this is the 4th complete year since I've let go of that fear and I can say that it's been the easiest thing I've done and I'm glad I've continued on. Change can ONLY bring new opportunities in LIFE and it sure has shown me a different way of living and thinking.

Closing the Holidays in 2012 have been a whirlwind and a great eye opener for sure! I was just commenting today to a friend of mine that we've lost some great people this year, although we've also gained many new arrivals in each and every one of our lives. As I begin every new year, I look at what I'm able to take with me and what I'm willing to leave behind. I see it as such a healthy way of continuing to accumulate NOTHING BUT THE BEST for myself that way I'm ready to go when someone needs me in any way shape or form. 

2012, you've been great! Thank you for EVERYTHING I've learned and EVERYTHING you've shown me...I now know what you were ALL about! Closing the door now......

2013....Let's OPEN you up and BEGIN! 

Happy New Year my friends!!!

Long Journey to Closing a Door

Feel stuck in LIFE?

Close a Door.

Feel a BIG Blah with nowhere to turn?

Close a Door.

Feel like you need a BIG PUSH?

Close a Door.

As we live LIFE everyday and every year, actually near the closing of every year is when we start to value what we STILL haven't done, rather than what we've achieved. Humanity has a lot to learn about itself especially when it comes to valuing accolades, achievements and personal progression.

So much we can instill in one another that we neglect what POSITIVES outweigh the NEGATIVES. TOO MUCH time is spent on the name we have yet to create for ourselves instead of the ripple effect we've stamped here on Earth and how many lives we've already affected. Due to the increasing volume of Reality Television, our lives lack privacy and the need for PERSONAL STRUGGLE. In other words, it's OK if everyone doesn't know what were going through, what were all about on the inside, as long as we get the task at hand done, that's all that matters. 

STRUGGLE is needed to reflect on what our strengths and weaknesses are, it shows our capabilities and above anything our need to begin a new journey. 

If you're looking at LIFE and making it hard to complete your current task, then maybe it's time to close ALL other distractions and continue on focusing your energy on what really would make you happy and willing to excel in.

A NEW year can bring new opportunities and a new outlook, although if any distractions continue, it will only be worse and make you that much more confused in your abilities to help yourself and others.

Now that were closing on 2012, remember and take into account what POSITIVES you've learned and have been wanting to continue on to make yourself better, and if there are ANY negatives to 2012, make sure you've taken them into consideration and as simple as this act is, 

CLOSE THE DOOR.

Closing a Door is simply that, you have no time to dwell on the past, you've learned from it's peace offering, and you're moving forward. 

"CATCH MY BREATH" by Kelly Clarkson is the PERFECT "Close the Door" anthem, just listen to what she's done in the past and what she's looking to do in the upcoming future.

Close that Door my friends <3

How to Continue...Without You

This week has been a somber one where the news has been filled with so much loss, and as we keep losing people, losing loved ones, it's only fair to ask how can we continue with LIFE without them in it to make a considerable positive difference? 

Everyone's different in the way HEALING works, in the way our hearts make themselves better, in the way we each pick up the broken pieces...yet the only way were ALL similar in these type of  situations is when we're  ready to move on. I speak a lot about moving on because at some point or another we ALL have to cross that bridge in order to make our lives full of love once again. 

When we cut our chains of hurt we can especially understand the need to become fulfilled once more and know the WANT of becoming whole. That doesn't mean we are to forget our past and leave those that are no longer with us in the timeless space of nothing, though its quite the opposite. We can move on with our experience of loss and only get better within ourselves in order to help those whom we will be encountering in our future going through what we've been through already. Take the past, learn to gain more than just sorrow and tears, and allow there to be room for growth in more ways than one. 

As humans we can't expect to always gain and never experience loss, whether by natural causes or sudden tragedy. We must be equal with LIFE as it comes. As angry as we can become and want to tear everyone around us apart, we must deal with the reality of  learning how to continue with our loss. How? As only I have learned to put it, ONE step at a time. 

Grieving is there for our us to learn from and become aquatinted with, we can only be as good as we are to become if we go through the motions of the soul. I myself have needed to learn that it takes steps and it takes time to understand the healing process...maybe not now, although at one point or another, we'll be able to continue with life in front of us with our past inside of our hearts. 

My deepest prayers and love to ALL 

who are in their time of need <3

FAITH

So much can be said about this word, and I myself have said quite a bit in the past 2 years about my own personal ups and downs with FAITH...this time, I'll give you the "Will Power" of what it takes to have FAITH in your lives.

FAITH is anything BUT negative. Many people out in the world will always make it known that FAITH is just a figment of your imagination wanting to get close to something so bad that you invent it in your head that there's something more out there, when there really isn't. In any case, when FAITH is being put to the test, we forget that it's actually us who make FAITH work in our favor because we're trying to prove it wrong every second we have to gratify our selfish human egos. 

Please understand that FAITH is that of its most importance not just when we need a miracle to happen, rather everyday that we get another opportunity to live. You don't have to SEE FAITH to believe it, even though we do everyday, instead, FAITH is usually measured by our strength in understanding the unknown. Now "preachy" or not, one way or another, you're going to have a battle with what the TRUTH is in LIFE. Yet that's the ultimate GIFT that's been bestowed upon us, which is the power of FREE WILL, being able to believe whatever it is we want to believe in, whether influenced or having it be a natural gut instinct. 

FAITH is the art of believing WITHOUT having to see it in front of you. Just like when were wanting to accomplish the unexpected, we have our loved ones say to us, "I believe in you! You can do it". That's exactly what FAITH is, having the ability and strength to believe in the unknown. So if it's that easy for us to have FAITH in one another, why is it so hard to have FAITH in a higher power that looks at everything we do? Simple...we get scared at the thought of having someone whom we don't know see everything that were doing because it feels like an intrusion..although in the end, we wouldn't have LIFE without this higher power, firsthand I can tell you, in my honest and true opinion, we're NOTHING without HIM. 

No matter what age you're at, 5, 10, 20, 40, 60 or beyond, it's never too late to discover FAITH...all it takes is a bit of self discovery in knowing what path is best for you to grow in a positive and uplifting way. If you still haven't made the effort to know what FAITH is all about, just look around you and see where you're at in LIFE, and ask yourself, "How was it that I've come this far?"..the rest is up to you at your own pace. 

Finding

Another

In

Through

HIM

"This I Know"-->A musical past continues...

It's going on almost 4 years since my music ventures ended...by ventures I mean recording, writing and performing the songs that once filled my head and had me vocalize what my heart had endured years prior. Altogether I had compiled 3 independent albums that featured covers of some of my favorite songs, and 1 independent album that contained original written material, 7 notebooks filled with lyrical content ranging from heartache to personal independence. 

As a solo artist I was able to reach a development deal on the east coast for a year, unfortunately the company folded and there went my investment. I tried out for American Idol Season 2 and made it to the top 500 in Hollywood, Ca. I was a part of my church choir/band for 5 years having started out as a background singer and ending as a lead singer and I had formed 2 incarnations  of my own band "Image-One1" performing in a coffee house and then stretching to church festivals. 

I decided to end my run with my band and as the lead singer of the church choir/band wanting a fresh start to a career that I had already worked at just as hard as my musical endeavors, hair and make-up artistry. At this time I had also ended my very short lived courtship with my ex-boyfriend wanting to flee the trapped box I felt I was in. I even thought that ending that relationship would give me more material to write about in my music, yet that wasn't the case. 

I wrote my first song since I left music just last year in August of 2011. It felt like a ton of bricks had been lifted off of me. Since then I have only written 4 songs that have been completed along with 2 others that need to be finished. Yesterday as I was loathing the task of doing my laundry for 3.5 hrs, my mind started wandering in the realm of music and as I was folding and waiting for my "whites" to be tumble dried, I had written what has become my 4th song aptly titled "This I Know". Strange how words can just flow from one end to the next isn't it?! This song took me all of 15 minutes to complete, and I even have a chosen melody for it...and in due time, I will let you all hear the full sound of this and the many more songs I will continue to be writing as LIFE goes on. 

For now, here is "This I Know" for your viewing pleasure:

There's only one space left for you,
Come out and fit in where you can,
There's only one memory left to live
In all of life's dreams.

Look up and See
How you dream of me
Say it as you feel me so clearly
This I know, you love me.

There's only one more debt left to pay,
Why can't you see it off and let it go?
There's a word for what's inside,
Only I can push and shove.

Look up and See
How you dream of me
Say it as you feel me so clearly 
This I know, you love me,
Look now and Show
Lift us up against the world
They have no chance to win I know
We will live to move the skies.

You don't believe me?
You don't see it?
Lift my arms above
Catch me once you've gained our trust.

You don't believe me?
You don't see it?
My heart is yours alone,
This I know we are meant for more.


Look up and See
How you dream of me
This is one last opportunity
Come rule right next to me.

By: Erik Velasco
BLQ MUSIC PRODUCTION 2012

The art of the "Unfair" Syndrome

Being "Thankful" isn't enough for many these days, especially when it comes to having lost something, someone, or in the process of losing in their life. Just as tomorrow is NEVER promised, NEITHER are the things that at one point get granted to us. To understand that NOTHING is forever is not a subject or topic that our minds can comprehend in a certain amount of days, months, or even years, truthfully and quite frankly we can't put a number on it because our hearts and minds work and comprehend at a different rate, what the heart may understand the mind at times simply cannot and vice versa. 

I've heard and dealt with lots of the following topics that are seemingly "Unfair" to many in the past month:

-->Near broken and/or already broken relationships 

-->Lack of Material possessions 

-->Unhappiness

The world is a cruel one as we speak, although, please see that even being alive and having what you already have around you is enough to get you through your hard times. In lieu of mourning the loss, think of how you're able to wake up day after day and are willing to maintain a sane outlook on what can actually become a burden. 

Those of you morning the loss of a loved one, I'm very sorry about your recent and unforeseen incident. My heart goes out to you and know that if anything, by talking through the pain, you're allowing yourself to build on your healing. Take your time in healing without letting the dark thoughts consume you, always have someone beside you to catch your sense of being.

Those of you whose amorous relationships are on the rocks and/or ending, LET IT BE what it shall become. You hold on to what's not supposed to be a part of you and you will be experiencing a internal backlash, one that clearly doesn't belong to you. Manifest your energy to those whom you've been holding out on, those whom deserve your every smile and happy thoughts. It's never too late to regain your positivity by letting go of what doesn't belong to you anymore and believe me, IT'S FOR A REASON.

Those of you whom are unhappy in your lives and wish for better things to materialistically receive, please enjoy what's left of your personal intimacy. To be able to appreciate and love oneself is an art, it is an ability to keep going and keep seeing the same goal you've always had for yourself. To be able to manifest and create a masterpiece, one must put their best attribute to work and make the best piece of artwork the world has ever seen, for there's ONLY 1 of you..show what you can do for the right reasons.

Yes, LIFE is unfair, that I recognize and will tell you that at one point it feels good to complain and throw away ALL hope. Although, Loss and Unhappiness can and will result in you having mastered  the art of "Unfairness", yet, remember to be upfront with yourself and know when to understand LIFE for what it is...a TRUE BLESSING, especially when helping yourself and someone else see through those dark clouds and into the light.

Be an example of 

SURVIVAL and STRENGTH, 

not one of 

DEFEAT and UNFAIRNESS.

Feel so much...We cannot say a word

Today, as I was listening to "I Will Remember You" the Mirrorball live version by Sarah McLachlan on my phone, and as I was peddling my calories away on the bicycle at the gym, my mind was only amplified that much more as Sarah's voice filled my ears with so much interest as to what LIFE can often give us as we LIVE day after day.

Every week is a different week for us as individuals and some weeks are better than others, just as some days are also better than others. One never knows how much CHANGE can really affect us until it comes and bombards us with shifts, shakeups and a bit of a rumble. All the while, working in the professional world, we are meant to not let it affect us and especially in our overall outcome in our work...hence why when I heard Sarah sing the lyrics, 

"It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word"

...it just hit me! Being HUMAN just is a task and a half!

Now you might be saying to yourself, "Was he really listening to Sarah McLachlan while working out in the gym?" I sure was! When inside I'm battling decisions and trying to make sense out of the rumble of CHANGE, truthfully when I listen to Sarah McLachlan her message as a singer-songwriter just makes everything clear and I'm able to make sense out of the mixed emotions I have building up inside. 

I do have my upbeat mix in which I normally work out to, although today was a different story and as I ACTUALLY do take my own advice, I went OUTSIDE of my comfort zone and listened to a set of songs from an artist that I admire when in my down and chill time.

My message for everyone today is simply this:

The times when you feel like there's a lot on you and you can't make out where to start making a move, just step back and look upon what makes you clear your head and think about what goal in mind you would like for YOURSELF and not please others, for in the end, it'll be YOU who will reap any consequences and/or benefits. It may seem like a tornado has hit your mind, although when stepping back, it all becomes clear enough for you to start CLOSING doors and make a move, whether it be wrong or right, let the UNIVERSE have it's way.

"I Will Remember You" really opened my eyes today to a whole new avenue...a BIG thank you to Ms. Sarah McLachlan!

P.S. On a musical note, the Latin Grammy Awards are tomorrow at 8pm PST on the Univision Network (check your local listings).

I just wanted to wish REIK, a great TRIO of individuals, lots of LOVE and CONTINUED success as they are up for 2 Latin Grammy's tomorrow night, already having received the prestigious award in 2009. GOOD LUCK guys!!

Hunger Strike

 This song brings back so many fond memories for me being that it's one of my sister Mari's favorite song. Everytime it comes on the radio or on the iPod, we get so nostalgic!

If anyone is a fan of the Rock Groups Soundgarden and/or Pearl Jam, then I'm pretty sure you've heard this amazing collaboration between both lead vocalists Chris Cornell and Eddie Vedder. They actually have a full album of this material which is self titled  

"Temple of the Dog". 

With Hunger Strike as the 1st single to launch the album in 1991, it quickly caught the ears of ALL the genre's out there in the music industry. I have to put this in that it helps even more that BOTH lead vocalists are sexy sounding and handsome men to begin with, so even more appealing they were and STILL are.

 

Hunger Strike is a political statement that Chris Cornell at the time had been seeing in the world, all the injustice in food distribution, mainly all the wealthy had it all while the poor were going hungry, where by far, this can be applied in ANY country and in ANY situation. 

Political statements are very difficult to express especially because EVERYONE has an opinion and EVERYONE wants to jump on you once you open your mouth, whether right or wrong. In reality it's not about making a right or wrong decision, it's about making it an EQUAL and JUST decision in LIFE in general. 

 I genuinely feel that when a Political Statement is put into song, it goes farther and it allows ANY audience to perk up their ears and listen, Temple of the Dog in my opinion did just that! Take it from me, I was only 8 when this song came out, and it was on repeat in my house on the radio and on MTV.

RACE, GENDER, SEXUALITY, OPPORTUNITIES, HELP...ALL of these topics require EQUALITY...we have so much in the world that requires our full attention and all we can do as individuals is keep each other in line and instead of attacking one another, let's TALK about how we can join forces in making this world and OTHER countries a better foundation 

no matter the drift. 

Let US make a Difference and be HUNGRY for CHANGE!

Your Place...a Paula Deanda Vocal Flavor

Back in 2005 when I was creating hair for the girl band La Conquista (at the time signed to Q Productions), I remember being told about this young up and coming singer named Paula. A young 15 year old singer with a voice to fill your heart, soul and give you the chills as you heard her smooth vibrato. With the fresh and girl power look I was creating for the girl band, they thought I would be a perfect fit for the young Paula to be able to collaborate with her and create a signature look for her. 

Later I remember shopping at Target and seeing her self titled album Paula Deanda on the shelves, and thinking to myself, "Well, she's beautiful already, what would I be able to offer her?" So then I bought her album to listen to it and was BLOWN away!

 Clive Davis definitely signed a gem! 

Fast forward to 2007 when I was preparing La Conquista for a 3 day promotional tour in Miami, FL for which they would film 9 shows in 3 days and I would be in charge of their flowing long locks. Right before though, as the bassist of the band, my good and trusted friend Cecy, was looking for her wardrobe at the mall , she stumbled upon Paula and her Mom and had a conversation in which Paula had complimented her on her hair, which I had just finished the night before.

 Next thing I know, I get a phone call from Cecy telling me that Paula wants to know if I had an opportunity to do her hair that same day for a performance taking place that very same night? I was so nervous I had Cecy come with me for support in case my hairstyling chops sucked, after all, Paula by this time was Pop/R&B's Princess and rising! The rest is history.

Now forward to 2012, and Paula and I have collaborated on many of her projects, live performances, and her artistry in the music business. Not only do I consider her ONE of my top 3 favorite singers to listen to, she's a great friend who treats everyone around her with love and respect and has yet to give me a "Diva" moment. Which is why when she releases new music, I love spreading it everywhere so that the rest of the world listens and understands her passion and artistry for the music itself.

This year she's released a series of cover songs that contain the melody of the original song along with "Paula-Penned" lyrics that make you want to hear more! Just this past weekend on November 3rd, 2012, she released a new original song that exemplifies what her ability truly is, her vocal prowess and passion for R&B music.

"Your Place" talks about the desire of a woman's heart to let her love interest make the next move in their relationship, and once the move has been made, she'll fulfill his and her every need and collaborate on their love. I have to say that when first hearing Paula on her debut single, "Doin' Too Much" at age 15, she took charge of the song's obsessive message back then, and now as a woman at age 23 with "Your Place", she confirms her heart's self assurance in letting the man in her life know that she's the IT woman for him.

 

What I love about this track is the pull that her sweet soultry vocals give. Her higher range hits you at the right moments without having to overpower the smoothness of the melody behind her. This is the feeling that every woman waits for when she's ready for her man to take over, she's confident and strong in knowing what she wants and needs. 

Paula delivers just that!

Well, I'll let you all be the judge and listen to the latest and greatest...

here's 

"Your Place" 

by Paula Deanda

(Click on the Link)

http://rnbxclusivev4.com/2012/11/03/paula-deanda-your-place/

P.S. Happy 23rd Birthday Ms. Paula D! <3

You Know I'll be the One

This phrase can be taken in so many contexts, and of course they ALL lead to the same conclusion, just as it's written:

You Know I'll be the One

Ever pushed away anyone you've cared about a lot?

Done it more than once to "protect them"?

Are they the only ones who stand tall with you in the end?

The human soul and heart can be cruel in many aspects especially when it comes to our many insecurities that others instill in our minds. That's why when usually we have someone so dear to us we tend to push them away to not have them see our damage that exists inside. 

For many reasons, it's NOT O.K. to show true frowns, it's only possible to show ALL smiles..

How UNTRUE this is!

Without the frowns, we wouldn't have the smiles, 

and without pain, 

we wouldn't have the power of healing. 

Whether it's an addiction, a disease, an insecurity, an infectious way of living, know that there are at least 1-2 people around you that are willing to go through the storm with you. We look back in time at the Kings and Queens of the world, and even back to the B.C. era, they all had those next to them to help them heal and be guided in any situation. 

It's natural to get angry when our hearts become weak, it's natural to see many become concern for our well being. This is when we know that what we go through, what we feel, what tears we shed, what knots we get in our throat, they're as REAL as anything else that make us human enough to LIVE everyday. Those 1-2 people, or even more if were that lucky, are as real as your feelings, and will continue to be there in light of anything that comes your way. 

Fight against the stones that are being thrown your way, fight to keep your sanity and your mind clear of any clouds that come. DON'T fight those whom you know will say, 

"YOU know I'll be the ONE!". 

They'll be around for a LIFETIME...that I promise you!

I Find Myself Here (The Imaginative Future)

Craving the imaginative future that one holds in their mind is why we strive to make ourselves better, why we make certain decisions based on certain beliefs we hold inside, why we continue to become the positive reinforcement that everybody else around us learns from and why we love to let others know about our struggles and our successes. 

Sacrifice has a huge part in it as well and makes it worth while, at the same time it can create a stigma of "Were missing out on something". In TRUTH, when we LIVE and allow ourselves to LOVE what we LIVE, were NOT missing a thing. We gain so much in experience and meeting people from all walks of life that instead of "Missing out on something", were building and connecting to our future by choosing people that help out our personalities, path, and outcomes. 

For as any one of us crave to be that success story.

Once were at the brink of it all though, right when were about to jump into the next stage, were in a room and say:

"I Find Myself Here"

and reminisce about our past, what it took for us to realize what we've wanted to achieve, along with the losses and what we've managed to gain.

We hope NOT to freak ourselves out and start to question our choices and how we think we should handle our next move, yet don't you find it interesting that really all it would take is a split second to either throw it all away or make the best out of it?! 

One second changes

 EVERYTHING.

I'm glad to know and realize though that it's us solely, our own mind that finds itself standing in that room with nothing but our own hopes and dreams wanting to make it. Nothing and no one can change anything unless we decide to do so.

When you find yourself there, standing in that room, search and look toward what your dreams are. Though the thing to remember is, you've already gotten this far, already realized so many dreams in the making, now it's time to reach out, push yourself and not only crave that imaginative future as much as you can....

 

 start LIVING your dreams as much as you can!

Gravity

Set me free, 

Leave me be, 

I don't wanna fall another moment into your gravity, 

Here I am and I stand so tall, 

I'm just the way I'm supposed to be,

But you're on to me and all over me.

Gravity is such a lyrically strong filled emotional song that honors the pull and desire that LOVE has over us when trying to move on from our past. 

Ever get the texts, the missed calls, the endless emails and/or letters, the voicemails where all you hear is breathy air on the receiver? Doesn't this song bring you back to that time when you tried to move on and all you were getting were these empty messages that spelled out, 

"I don't know why but I just had to call you"?!

 Gives me chills just thinking about it.

Whether you were the broken or the one that broke a heart, you're able to relate to this Gravity love themed anthem. 

Why does LIFE have to be this difficult? Why do we have to go through this hurt? Why can't we just learn to let go in an instant? Why must we learn how to detach our hearts?

We can't be that insensitive to other hearts because we weren't made to be that way towards others. The first thing we learn as children is to respect and care for one another. We do it for so long that when we grow up and experience the downside of LOVE, we don't know what to expect, least of all know what to do with ourselves when our feelings are still in shock and only WANT the heartwarming sensitivity back in place instead of the sorrowful frowns were giving ourselves. 

 

 

As the earth rotates and the skies go from light to dark day after day and night after night, we hold a special place inside of us for those who not only taught us how to LOVE, but those whom also broke our fear, took down our walls and were able to give their every piece of happiness to fill our smiles.  

Lately for the past 4 days, I've been seeing clear signs that pinpoint and take me back to when I once loved wholeheartedly...and my heart expresses just like the song itself says:

Something always brings me back to you,

  It never takes too long....

and yet my mind says:

Set me free,

 Leave me be,

  I don't wanna fall another moment into your gravity.

Take a listen for yourselves...Enjoy!

A New Chapter...Why is it so scary?

Chapters in our lives are so prominent and apparent that when we KNOW it's time to write our last sentences and turn the page to begin a NEW chapter, 

we second guess ourselves and procrastinate. 

Trusting our instincts is difficult because were being swayed in both the path were longing for and the path were currently on, prolonging decisions and wanting to make the infinite choice that will decide our future.

So why is it that we find it "scary" facing a new chapter in our lives?

Couple reasons:

• We can't imagine living any other way other than the way were living at the current moment.
• Were afraid as to what others might say and in what category we get put in their minds.
• Crossing that bridge might either bring us to safety or it may crumble, uncertainty.
• How might we be able to survive with just our own support and values?  
• Will Success follow or will Karma have its way with me? 

I used to always make myself crazy thinking that by starting a new chapter in my life would mean that I couldn't handle my current situation and so I was looking for a way out. Until I really looked at what was really going on and found out that I was in a stagnant place in my life and I needed to find new challenges, new outlets and most importantly new goals. I had come to a point where I surpassed what I was yearning for and I made sure I took what I needed from my current experiences. I was ready to MOVE ON.

Moving on to the next level stimulates growth, makes you stronger, and takes you to uncharted territory where you never thought of stepping into. It's the best form of keeping intact without having to fall apart.

Fear as always is very common in this situation, if anything make a chart of Pro's and Con's and allow BOTH the facts and your drive to take you to where you need to be. 

Take a Leap of Faith 

and 

watch yourself GROW!

Permission NOT Required

I am always compelled to HAVE to understand why it is that certain individuals RESERVE the right to want to take the very essence of one's existence and MAKE a decision that they feel is right in their minds?!

In other words....

Why is YOUR permission required to live MY life?

29 years I've lived and have yet to understand others' insecurities about choices I make according to my liking and the way I choose to live. Same could be said for those whom have lived before me and those who will live after me. NOT understanding something doesn't mean you have to go against it or that you have to fear it. It simply means that you must research and if you can, TRY and WALK in the shoes of whom you are unable to understand.

Whether it was in my family, elementary school, middle school, high school, beauty school, church,  youth ministry or a simple walk down the street, there was ALWAYS something I had to prove, someone I ALWAYS had to explain myself to, SOME TASK I had to accomplish in order for others to feel safe. One thing is for sure though, for some reason I felt as if I always needed permission to feel safe in my own skin, then come later to find out that I NEVER needed anyone's permission to LIVE freely and LOVE to the best of my ability. 

It's hard to hear and see when someone you've loved and cared for the longest time doesn't want to see the weight lifted off your shoulders simply because they deny your truth and heart. Although on the other hand, if we weren't able to live and experience rejection and stubbornness from others we wouldn't be able to build our strength from the bottom up. 

I can say that I don't hate anyone that's ever rejected my heart, friendship, gift and way of life. I don't hold resentment against anyone who wasn't able to understand and feel acceptance for what it truly is, and neither should you. 

Knowledge is something were born with and we must continue to feed our minds and hearts whenever possible, even when we are confused and concerned. The only way we can stop growth from happening is when we refuse to let our minds expand and live within the box of our comfort instead of exploring what's on the outside of that comfort.

Permission is NOT required to LIVE and LOVE

for we ALL come from the same place and ONE source...

whomever that may be...

For me, I know 

GOD is GOOD...ALWAYS!

The X-Factor: Boot Camp Jitters

The vocal competition reality shows are back on! The tension and nerves of these contestants are shakier than ever too!

I was able to catch the first day of Boot Camp for the X-Factor tonight and in case you haven't heard, the judging panel are as follow:

L.A. Reid

 Record executive, Producer, Songwriter

Britney Spears

Recording Artist

Demi Lovato

 Recording Artist/Actress

Simon Cowell

 A&R executive, television producer, television personality

Pretty intimidating panel if I do say so myself!

After the open casting auditions the show held nationwide, it's now time to dwindle 120 acts to 24...yes 24!!!! Can you imagine the vibes and emotions backstage?!

Now what I love about this show for one, is the fact that they were able to get Britney on board. In my opinion she has changed and transformed the way we see Popstars today. Is there anything this woman hasn't done?! She's done it all, conquered all, and on her way to even greater success. 

Secondly, I love the fact that there's no age limit and even groups can audition, that makes for a more interesting plot. 

Now on this episode, each act was called up one by one to audition for a second time in front of the judges and eacchother, whether they were on point or not, there are 4 different judges with 4 different opinions, pleasing 3 out of 4 them is what these acts really need to do to move forward to the next round. So many great and talented singers and a lot of them that I personally liked weren't able to move on and yet a lot of them did make the cut. It breaks my heart to see any of them cry, at the same time, in these kind of competitions, you have to expect ANYTHING and EVERYTHING!

Song choice is everything in these competitions as well as keeping your nerves under control. It's hard to see a lot of them break down during their auditions and are so hard on themselves afterwards. As an audience, we tend to say, "Oh really??? WOW yeah you're done! Get out of there!" What we lack to remember is the fact that even the greatest of stars have had their meltdowns and even forgotten their lyrics onstage. The only difference between them and these contestants is the fact that they have someone solid in the industry that believes in them and backs them up. Even THEY have had their cries that we don't get to see (in a way that's a good thing). Performing in itself is harder than what it looks to be. 

For ANY contestant on X-Factor, The Voice and American Idol....you're BRAVE to put your gift out there for the world to see and judge, if you don't make it to the end, 

keep it going! 

DREAMS are only impossible to reach when you don't extend your hand.

Let's see what the rest of the X-Factor boot camp brings!

Compare Yourself to NO ONE

How hard is it NOT to compare yourself to anyone??? 

 VERY!!! 

 Realistically, it's a bit ridiculous how much time we waste in doing so, yet, we ALWAYS want what we can't have.

LIFE in general, with co-workers and piers, we either have the type of people that are happy for us when we succeed, or we have the jealous type that just want to keep us low to the ground who won't allow us to grow, instead, have them grow for us. 

Being negative and jealous is very infectious, and it can really wither away friendships and relationships all around. At times we might not even know that were feeling these negative thoughts until someone brings it up to our attention. By then, it might be too late. 

So by being negative at times, your flow can change, your goals, your outlook, and even wrinkles can appear a lot faster on your facial structure...it has been PROVEN y'all!

Why be jealous of the person to your right and/or left? 

Why compare your achievements to those of your siblings? Why compare yourself to yourself and make YOURSELF the bad guy as you stare at your image in the mirror?

Everyone in this LIFE has struggled, cried, hurt, bled, and have submitted themselves to shame at some point in their existence. Nothing has come easy and on a silver platter without having there been consequences and hoops to jump in and out of. 

If and when you see the person next to you have a happy moment, ENJOY their smile and FEEL their excitement. It's so beautiful to see and feel what another person is so excited about. When you hear that one of your siblings has great news, GLOW with them and let them know how their growth and determination has really made them stronger. When you see yourself advancing to the next level of LIFE and actually enjoy the ride, be PROUD of yourself and walk PROUDLY for every sacrifice has met it's match. 

With the sibling rivalries, know that you're there for eachother and you'll get farther in LIFE by teaming up as a unit rather than try to compete against one another. Live your lives according to what YOUR goals are, not to how you can upstage your fellow brethren, EVEN if your parents are being biased, let them be, YOU ARE YOU and allow them to know that about you.

YOU have your own goals, YOU have your own mind, YOU have your own way of LIFE....

YOU OWN YOURSELF and compare yourself to NO ONE!